Hope Falls

"I am sorry for whatever I have done that has made us feel like strangers," Kael swallowed, opening his mouth to speak but only a sob escaping it. "I- I haven't thought I've bene treating you any differently to how o normally would I- I keep fighting with people I love since I have come back but I didn't even think we were arguing s- so- I-"

“It is me. I am at fault.” Indira shook her head mournfully, “I have created this problem in my mind, my sister agreed, I was creating things in my mind… I’m sorry I’ve upset you so much… Please forgive me. I did not mean to cause this…”

Kael shook his head, taking a breath so deeply he choked on it. Moving slowly, fearfully to slip off his shoes so he could rest them on the bed beside her. Slipping his arms around her to bring her in.

Indira leaned into him, head instantly resting against his chest. Body trembling with her efforts to not break as she breathed softly, smoothing her hand against her sons back to help him sleep.

"Why are you trying to be strong? I - I have had my mother and father to break in front of, and I still feel like I need to again. You -" He let out a breath. "Feel.. Indira. It's okay. Th- that was awful, it was - th- the worst thing I have experienced so for you it must have been..."

“Because I do not trust that I will come back if I break; I fear I will lose my mind, and you will have to bring me back to earth as only you can when I have one of my episodes. And I have already been unfair to you tonight. I cannot be unfair any further by making you do that when you are hurting just as much as I am - “ Indira shook her head, cutting herself off with rapid breaths. “It is good, that your parents have been there for you. It is good.”

"There is a second crib in here," Kael noted, glancing towards the side of the room nearest the window. "Let me settle Idris over there, where he can rest and then - then I need you to let yourself feel, Indira. I have them... you - you have me. No matter what that brings."

“I have spend the day with our son… I have - It felt not right to just keep calling him the baby. So I have been using Bodhi…” Indira whispered, glancing to the cribs when they were mentioned. “If you do not like it we - we can go thorough some other names. He must have one before he’s - “

"Bodhi. Idris and Bodhi." Kael swallowed, giving a small nod of acceptance. Keeping his head lowered to kiss the top of her head gently. "Have you looked at him? H- He is amazing, isn't he? I mean - boys of them are. It is hard to wrap around my head, having two sons."

“Your Ada was right when she said we would always be connected. Joined in their faces forever…” Indira nodded, closing her eyes at his kiss. “All the hair too, was unexpected…”

"So much of it." Kael laughed joyously then, glancing up as Avani pushed the door open once more.

"Time to take the medicine, Indira. Bodhi has enough people to care for him where he is going, you aren't to follow." Avani whispered, frowning at her sister in Kael's arms. Nodding towards the tea on the bedside counter beside them, "Please."

"Mm," Kael hummed his agreement, picking the cup up to offer it to Indira. "I will leave both boys with you, for now. Go and find my mother to tell her the arrangements we'll be making to say goodbye to Bodhi."

“Can I not have more time?” Indira asked, blinking her eyes open with a soft sigh.

"You've already had too much, keep pushing it and you'll get none." Avani spoke more teresly then. "Indira, do not make looking after yourself a battle."

Indira nodded in defeat, “He will be burned, and some of his ashes buried here. The rest saved for you to take back home with you and release there. Lily has already said I won’t be able - I won’t be able to go but you, you will show them, make sure they do it properly?” She asked, voice shaking at the thought of not being there.

"It can wait, I am sure. I am sure Bodhi will not mind waiting until you are healthy enough to come home, I have already told you I have no intention of going back whilst you are unwell Indira."

"Not a conversation to have right now." Kael grimaced, pressing the cup into Indira's hand gently. "One day at a time. Drink."

Indira nodded, taking the cup from Kael with her free hand, the other still holding onto Idris. Grimacing as she downed the foul tasting liquid before handing Kael back the cup.

"Well done," He whispered, placing it back on the side before his arms settled around Indira once more. Directing at Avani, "I'll be here, until she sleeps. If you need to do anything..."

Avani narrowed her eyes at him. "I have less to do than you,"

Indira curled into him, closing her eyes as she used her thumb to gently soothe Idris.

---

“So… with that letter…” Isolde shook her head with a deep sigh, bunching her fists in frustration. “They cannot be serious about only negotiating with Kael. I refuse to drag him into this right now.”

“Scouts have been sent out, to determine the situation further. I made sure the best men were sent - “

“Hush, Cavanaugh. The best men were already sent.”

Avani shook her head, anger flashing across her face when Kael nodded towards the door. Though she bit her tongue and stepped out of the rooms, into the hallways.

"Be careful, about your mind playing tricks on you." Kael whispered, resting his head on top of hers as he smoothed her hair down gently. "You are a priority, you and our sons. I'm never going to throw you away, never going to disregard you. You are stuck with me in your life forever, I am afraid."

---

"'There are very little scouts can determine for us, it is dangerous to send them in but if it is already done..." Aodhän sighed, rubbing his hand across his forehead. "Bringing Kael into this isn't an option, mpt for a few days at the least."

“The men aren’t happy about being ordered to not go out. They wish to help Hawk.”

“The men can shove their happiness where the sun doesn’t shine right now.” Isolde shook her head, waving her hand at the door. “Go be productive elsewhere, Cavanaugh. You’re not doing much of it here. Go tend to your wounded.”

Cavanaugh rolled his eyes when he could not be seen, turning and leaving without another word.

---

“I am sorry… It has been a lonely few months. And I have only just got you and Avani back into my life. The thought of you slipping away, being alone again…”

Avani paused in the doorway to her own rooms when she heard his footsteps coming down the hall. Offering a tired smile when he came into sight, encouraging quietly, "Come inside, tell me why those footsteps are so heavy."

---

"Someone is trying to step into Hawk's place." Aodhän scoffed his amusment, shaking his head as he watched the man leave.

---

"I never left for good, it was just to... look good. It wasn't a jolly, just duty. I'll have to do that Indira, you know that. You know what everything entails."

“I know… but your duty does not extend to your - not even your mistress, and your bastards. Your duty is to your wife and any children she has. And my mind… convinced me that you would find your new duties too consuming for anything else.” Indira moved her hand to brush across Idris’ hair, taking a shaky breath.

---

Ruairi looked around wordlessly, ensuring they were alone before wrapping an arm around Avani’s waist and coaxing her into her rooms.

---

“He has clearly convinced himself that with Hawk gone he is in charge. It is not how this works.”

"What has happened?" Avani questioned, voice still quiet in case anyone lurked outside as she pushed the door closed behind them.

---

"It is a dangerous attitude, we can not fetch those men he has sent back. If they end up dead.. this will get out of hand."

---

"You are not my duty, nor my mistress. You are one of my closest friends, Indira, which is a much better thing to be." Kael ducked his forehead to touch it to the side of her head. Whispering in her ear, "I will always need you, especially when everything else consumes me."

“Aodhän and the Queen are insisting we wait a day before they send rescue. They are saying it is to truly understand the Wolves numbers, they are saying they do not want to send more men to their deaths which I understand but - the longer we wait… Wyatt will survive. He is huge and he is the ransom prize. But the others? They won’t.”

---

“And I will always need you in return.”

---

“Men get so inflated with their own ego they forget that danger is present. He will believe I don’t care about Hawk, just as his wife will. And it is not the case. But the lives of the dozen or so men in collective Cavanaugh wants to risk matter more than just the one.”

"So you don't have to worry, all is well. Despite what I am sure your sister is saying about me, I will always be fighting in your corner, Indira."

---

"How many men were taken along with him?" She questioned, hand lifting up to graze her knuckles against Ruairi's cheek

---

"This is what I tried to emphasis too, before you came in." Aodhän shook his head. "I prefer the man when he is a follower, he refuses to listen to reason. So much has to be dealt with before rescue missions."